The Al Dente 4th of July Side Dish Compendium

Source: The Oatmeal

No one is going to let you hold your own Independence Day cookout. Let’s face it, dear reader, you’re irresponsible and a terrible host(ess). And why would you want to host your own party in the first place? The setup, cleanup, entertaining everyone, and cooking are enough, but then there is always one person that never knows when it’s time to leave. Don’t be that guy either.

Instead, be a good guest this Independence Day. Show up early, but not too early. Bring alcohol, but nothing too fancy or obscure; grab something that is best consumed cold. Offer to help, but stay out of the way. Leave before you overstay your welcome. And, if you do none of that, bring a kickass dish to pass.

Let the host slave over the hot fire and get high on propane fumes and lighting fluid vapors. You just park your butt in a chair with your +1 and revel in the freedom for which many people not related to you once died to preserve.

After all, it’s the American way.

For you, dear reader, I offer this list of side dishes that you should absolutely consider bringing to the 4th of July cookout you are not hosting. And, if you have the honor of inviting 15 to 20 sweaty, hungry souls to your home for the holiday, may God have mercy on you. And, if that’s the case, I suggest cole slaw.





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